Q: What is the difference between a chemist and a chemical engineer?
A: IQ
Q: What do you do with a dead chemist?
A: Barium
Q: What reagent will keep you going?
A: Phenolphthalein
Q: Does your lab research deliver predictable results?
A: If I knew what I was doing, it wouldn’t be research.
Q: Why did you become a chemist?
A: I wanted to meet one of the coeds I’d heard were hanging around the chemistry building hoping to snag a guy in a white lab coat.
Q: Which chemical smells the best?
A: Methyl salicylate
Q: Which chemicals taste the best?
A: Read the ingredients of a jar of pickle relish.
Q: What chemical has brought humanity closer together?
A: Aluminum chlorohydrate.
